


Made a Mistake (Never Again)

by Princessunicornblue



Series: Let it all go free [1]
Category: Jessica Jones (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bearded Steve Rogers, Blackmail, I wrote this in three hours, Multi, Not Steve Rogers Friendly, Obsessive Behavior, Prostitution, Stalking, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, but he aint the best, i dont know anymore, its not heavily anti steve
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-25
Updated: 2019-07-25
Packaged: 2020-07-19 10:37:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19972687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Princessunicornblue/pseuds/Princessunicornblue
Summary: Steve wanted to tell her that she knew nothing, that she didn’t know him or his past. Jessica had no right to put her nose into any of his business, that she was invading his personal life and that was punishable. But he knew she wouldn’t listen, that she would only fight him in every way possible. Jessica Jones was famous for being stubborn, he’d heard the rumors around the Compound about how bad she was.He stepped back, going over her words and figuring out a way around her. She wouldn’t be getting away with this, not if he had anything to do about it.Sequel to When I Hear Your Body Move





	Made a Mistake (Never Again)

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote the second part to WIHYBM a long time ago, but due to extenuating circumstances (I accidentally deleted all my WIPs and now I have to rewrite everything) I have redone this with a whole new story in a matter of three hours! This was originally going to be much different, but then I was thinking of the last line in the first part of the story and then it got to me. So enjoy and let me know if its good or not so I can fix it because honestly this was hella rushed, but I like it so . . .

Steve gave a deep sigh as he lay back in the lumpy motel mattress, the smaller man next to him was still panting hard, exhausted and utterly worn out. The smaller man was starting to become a regular for Steve, the most similar to what he really wanted that it was almost addicting to experience. And it was an experience, alright. He had plush lips that spread so wide and sucked so hard that it was a wonder how no one had simply just scooped him up and taken him for their own. Sometimes Steve feared that one day his brain would be sucked out of himself one of these nights by the smaller man next to him. His brown eyes were big and prone to tears often, lashes always clumped thick and long enough to brush beautifully against his high cheekbones with every dazed flutter. The skin tone wasn’t the same, lighter than the perfect tanned olive tone he dreamt about every night. But the rest was pretty damned close. Same tousled curls, same lithe form, same round ass that blew his mind. He almost looked like  _ him _ , but almost wasn’t enough to completely satisfy him.

“You went harder than usual tonight, big guy.” Casey had finally gotten his breath back, leaning on his arm to peer at Steve in concern. The voice was too high, not as deep or effortlessly smooth as he knew it should be. “Something going on in that blonde head of yours?”

“It’s nothing. Just some trouble in the workplace.”

Steve started to rise to get his clothes together, feeling the familiar twinges of regret that he’d done this once again. It was a cycle for him; anxiety, acquiescence, and guilt all warring inside him until he had the itch to contact Casey again. A hand rested on his shoulder, Casey’s brown eyes staring into his blue ones with sincerity that made him pause.

“I know I’m being paid for sex, but sometimes I get paid to listen to people talk to me.” Steve cringed internally, hating to be reminded that he was paying for sex. Casey was a nice rentboy, discrete and hardy enough to handle extreme pressures that most of his clients threw at him. Also, he looked enough like a certain billionaire superhero that you could almost mistake them for being related. “Besides, I hear that talking to strangers really gets things off the chest.”

Steve tried to be as vague as possible, not wanting to expose sensitive information about members of his team that could ruin them. He told Casey about everything, about the Civil War, about how much he loved Tony and Bucky, how he screwed it all up and pushed the two of them away from himself. He revealed how heartbroken he was, how terrible he felt and how he didn’t mean to make so many mistakes. At the end of it all, he had his head in Casey’s lap and was enjoying the soothing feeling of fingers running through his hair. Casey occasionally scratched at the beard he’d been growing, dark and reflecting how he felt inside.

“Alright, hot stuff, let me give you some advice. You’ve gotta learn to forgive yourself and let go of the things you love sometimes because it's unhealthy to be this obsessed. It seems to me that your friends have moved on from the issue, but you haven’t done the same. You made some mistakes and you apologized, now you just have to keep going. Maybe it would help if you kept yourself at a distance for a bit, get yourself used to being on the outside before you go back in.”

* * *

For the next few days, Steve was busy thinking over what Casey had told him and fighting minor AIM goons. Distancing himself would probably have been the easiest thing ever, considering that he wasn’t necessarily close to many people these days, not like he was with Bucky and Tony. He still had friends, but none he gave his all to. Distancing himself consisted of doing mission after mission with hardly any break in between. Director Ross had kept sending him glances that looked like suspiciously like worry every time a new danger was discovered. Every Avenger was disconcerted with the way Steve was throwing himself into fight after fight, ignoring the bruises on himself and relying solely on the super-soldier serum to keep him up and going. Occasionally he would spend some quick downtime with Casey when he was actually supposed to be in the medbay healing from whatever injuries he sustained. Usually, those times lasted at least an hour or less depending on when he could get prepared for his next mission.

It was all fine and functioning nicely until a certain raven-haired private investigator joined the ranks. Steve hadn’t immediately hated her, was nice and cordial to Jessica Jones until she started acting weird around him. There were three weeks of peace, Steve starting to reintegrate himself back into the fold of the Avengers Initiative and Jessica Jones getting used to how things worked. Someone must have told her something because after that she started watching Steve intently. He could feel her eyes on him as he walked around the compound, could feel her stare intensify whenever he was around Tony. Sometimes he could feel her when he was wandering around the city at night, even outside the apartment he bought in Brooklyn, only blocks away from the old one he used to live in as a kid.

He hadn’t immediately said anything about it, not wanting to blow a whistle when nothing was really going on, but it was still creepy. So he decided to be upfront with her about it.

“Why do I get the feeling that you’re following me, Ms. Jones?”

Steve had cornered her in the communal kitchen when she was alone and sitting at the counter, silently eating a bowl of cereal that contained the most sugary taste known to man. It had to have been Clint's cereal, nobody would have risked a rotten tooth otherwise, not even the Spider-kid, Parker.

“You always this quick to assume that there are people following you, Rogers? Maybe you should get that checked out sometime.”

Realizing that he wouldn’t get anything out of her, he left the room.

* * *

“You know, I was actually kind of concerned that you would drop our time down to thirteen minutes this time. This was a nice surprise.”

Steve had slowed down on the missions which meant that he got to spend more time with Casey whenever the itch see him arrive. There wasn’t much guilt and anxiety surrounding the whole affair now, just a habitual need to blow off steam with a trusted partner that held no strings attached. Steve agreed to the sentiment, not wanting to admit how much he missed this, how much he missed Casey and his understanding nature.

“I’m going to start staying around more often, so I’ll probably see you every other week or whenever. It’s all up to when you feel comfortable.”

Casey lifted himself off of Steve’s chest, looking down at the blonde man with an uptick of the corner of his lips. There was still sweat rolling off the slope of his shoulders, pooled into the curve of his neck and lips. His neck was full of marks, bruises on his hips and thighs and wrists, dark and shocking against his skin.

“And what if I want you around more than usual? Like every day? What would you say to that?”

“Every day?” Steve asked incredulously. He couldn’t possibly believe that Casey would be able to handle him every day. The future was full of many advances, but no so much as to repair the body that quickly and often. “I don’t think so. I don’t think you could handle me so often. That’s why I give you a bit of space before we get back together.”

Casey’s alluring smirk turned into a frown, dark brows on his forehead furrowing before quickly smoothing out. He leapt from the bed, gathering his clothes and furiously dressing.

“What’s wrong? Did I say something?” Steve was utterly confused as to what had gone wrong, going back over everything he said, the little tells that he missed. It was so glaringly obvious and made him feel so incredibly stupid. He groaned, hand reaching out to halt Casey’s angry flailing. “Casey wait.”

“Every time I feel like sometimes there’s more to being paid for a connection, there’s always a reminder that I could never be appreciated or loved. Don’t worry about me, Steve. I’m sure that some space between us will make it easier for me.”

Casey yanked his hand from Steve’s grip, leaving his apartment and slamming his door shut. Steve fell to the sheets, regretting the habit he had of putting his foot in his mouth. There were times when he could really say something great, but most times he couldn’t keep his mouth shut and then things like this happened. He would give Casey some time to cool down before he saw him again, then he would apologize and beg forgiveness.

* * *

Tony and Steve had gotten into another fight today, a screaming match that ended with Steve slamming his hand into the granite countertops and making a mess of things once again. He’d been stressed since Casey left in a huff the night before, the sight of Tony and Bucky shamelessly kissing in the kitchen not making any of it better for him. He still wasn’t really over it, still pining helplessly over a man he had no chance with. He’d teased that it wasn’t proper or nice to show such behavior in front of the kids, gesturing to Parker, Lang, and that Keener kid that occasionally dropped by to visit Tony. Tony had jumped on the defensive, claiming that Steve had no right to complain about anyone kissing when he thought that he could assault anyone simply because he thought he was correct. Barnes had stepped between the two of them, knowing that a fight was sure to break out, gesturing for Lang to escort the two teens out before things got ugly.

It hadn’t gotten so far as to an exchange of punches, but the yelling had gotten loud enough that his ears were still ringing by the time he stormed out of the gym. Any interaction between him and Tony had been met with condescension between both men, facing off against one another like two rams.

* * *

There was a manila envelope in his gym locker, tucked underneath his clothes and labeled with only his name. There was no one else in the locker room, early enough in the morning that no one was close to waking up. Steve asked FRIDAY to scan it for anything dangerous. She assured him that it was safe, just a simple envelope.

“Do you have any footage of who slipped this in here?” He asked, opening the flap to reach inside. There were photos of himself entering the motel rooms he met Casey in, his own apartment where he stood at the door letting Casey inside, and many others of them together in intimate ways. It was clear what the photos were; blackmail material. Steve shoved them all back into the envelope and slumped against the lockers. This was a very stressful week and it had only gotten worse.

“I have no footage about who placed these photos in your locker, Mr. Rogers. Would you like me to call Boss to investigate the incident?”

“No!” Steve cried, waving his arms wildly in alarm. He knew that Tony only kept cameras in the locker room for safety purposes, only keeping the footage in a safe server that would never be opened with the exception of certain situations. He didn’t want Tony to look into the problem, knowing just how it would all look when everything was revealed to the other man. He didn’t want him to know how disgusting he was, how desperate Steve was for him that he had to find security in the embrace of a man that looked similar to Tony. God! He wished that he never made this decision in his life. And now he’d potentially put Casey’s life in danger. “Tony must never know about this,  _ ever. _ I think it would be best if I deal with this myself, okay?”

FRIDAY made a sound that must have been a hum, the emotion behind it judgemental and entirely too human for artificial intelligence.

* * *

The pictures kept on finding its way to him, FRIDAY unable to find the person leaving them behind, and the threat clear to him. He had done someone wrong and he had to make up for it. Casey had been angry when Steve asked if he had been involved, insulted and still angry about Steve’s obtuseness with their last meeting. He yelled and screamed until Steve apologized, begging forgiveness on his knees and sighing when he got it.

“Sometimes I wonder why I even fall in love with men like you.”

Casey left shortly after that with a promise to be more careful.

Eventually, the pictures stopped and were replaced with a note, the script messy and the ink smudged on the paper.

‘ _ Sexual Assault isn’t very patriotic, Captain. I think it’s really telling how you prefer rent boys that resemble Tony Stark, how obsessed you are with a man that no longer loves you. It would be a shame if these photos got sent to the famous billionaire himself. I’m only gonna say this once; Tony Stark is not an object for you to control, stop pretending that he is.’ _

There was no signature or anything else on the note, just a written message threatening him. Steve took the message seriously, tracking it until he stumbled upon its owner.

“Took you long enough, Mister Icemeister.”

Jessica Jones sat sprawled across the length of the sofa in the common room, watching late-night television and ignoring the strip of moonlight cutting half her face in shadow and the other in light. Her smile was smug as Steve struggled to control his rage, realizing that his privacy had been raided and he’d been led on a goose chase to find his stalker. She’d followed him for god knows how long, took unwanted pictures of him and threatened him for some reason he couldn’t even fathom. What was her goal? Why was she doing this?

“What the hell is the matter with you?” Steve ground out, fists tight next to his hips. “You put me through all this trouble just to threaten me? And for what reason? What did I ever do to you?”

“It’s not me that you’ve wronged, but Tony Stark. I can’t stand men like you that walk around and do whatever you want simply because you can, damn the consequences. You beat him down and tried to force yourself on him because you thought that you owned him. You don’t own anybody, Steve Rogers. You are not some high and mighty prick that can demand that everyone bow down to his whims. The world doesn’t revolve around you and you need to be reminded of that.”

“If Tony put you up to this, then he and I-”

Jessica swiftly rose to her feet, one pale finger pointed directly to his chest as she spoke in a low voice.

“You will  _ never _ touch him again, nor will you force him to do anything he doesn’t want you. You will respect and appreciate him because he has done more for you than you would ever know. Whatever sick obsession you have with him needs to stop, right now. Tony isn’t going to take you back anytime soon,  _ so get it in your head _ . That guy you’re screwing seems to really like you, so maybe you should stop pretending that he’s someone else and more on who he really is.”

Steve wanted to tell her that she knew nothing, that she didn’t know him or his past. Jessica had no right to put her nose into any of his business, that she was invading his personal life and that was punishable. But he knew she wouldn’t listen, that she would only fight him in every way possible. Jessica Jones was famous for being stubborn, he’d heard the rumors around the Compound about how bad she was.

He stepped back, going over her words and figuring out a way around her. She wouldn’t be getting away with this, not if he had anything to do about it.


End file.
